It is only Tuesday, and it has already been a very crazy week. Aside from not feeling very well, a person from the past decided to just run into my life again via internet. It caught me completely off balance. I cannot understand the reason behind the sudden email. There was not a kind word uttered between me and this person for years. We parted on very bad terms. This is why I am shocked by his actions. I had put this person in my past, where he should be, many years ago. Since our doomed drug induced relationship, I have met and married the love of my life. We have two children. I have been blessed many times in my life despite my transgressions. The only reason I can think of that this person is trying to apologize 11 years later is that he is involved in some 12 step program.
I simply explained in a response email that I have nothing to say to him and wished him a happy life. I am still totally suspicious of his actions. It provided no relief to me to read his half-assed apology. He almost put me in the wrong state of mind today. Seeing his name was like having a horrible flashback that I had no control over. An LSD trip that went totally wrong. Thankfully I can recognize now that letting myself feel this way is only empowering him. I will not participate in that at all! I put it out of my mind, and I do what I always do when I cannot get my frustration out. I write until it makes sense, and I feel completely cleansed. I also sought out other Wiccan's online, and I have received great advice on how to rid myself of the negativity that is radiating.
To be continued eventually ....
xoxo
drea
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